


Planetside Story

by tinycaesar



Category: Homestuck, West Side Story (1961)
Genre: Alternia has a moon colony populated mainly by lowbloods, F/M, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, West Side Story AU, borrows heavily from source material, no canon characters from Homestuck appear, or more of a Homestuck AU rather, play format
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-01
Packaged: 2018-02-07 02:44:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1882086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinycaesar/pseuds/tinycaesar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A group of lowbloods move to the main planet from a moon colony, hoping to build a better life. Instead, they find themselves constantly hassled by some blueblood teens who think they're all that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Planetside Story

**Author's Note:**

> Working straight from the West Side Story text, so similarities are inevitable.
> 
> I'm skipping the opening dance number, since it's not a thrill to read. If you don't know what that's supposed to entail: gang fights. Gang fights everywhere. You're not missing much, other than the awesome dancing. Which you couldn't get from a fanfic in any case.

KRUPKE

Knock it off! Settle down.

 SHRANK

All right: Cull each other! ...But not on my beat.

 RIFF [such innocence]

Why, if it isn't Legislacerator Shrank.

 SEVERAL WINGBEASTS [dancing class manners]

Top of the evening, Legislacerator Shrank.

 BENARD [one with Riff]

And Neophyte Krupke!

 SEVERAL LANDBEASTS

Top of the evening, Neophyte Krupke.

 SHRANK

Grubfucking shit, what you lowblood moondwellers have done to this neighborhood. Which one of 'em clobbered ya, Ayrahb?

 [Ayrahb looks to Riff, who takes over with great helpful seriousness.]

 RIFF

As a matter of factuality, your cullawfulness, we suspicion the job was done by a copperlice agent.

 SNOBOY

Two agents.

 AYRAHB

Oh, at least!

 KRUPKE

Impossible!

 SHRANK

Didn't nobody tell ya there's a difference between bein' a defecating citywingbeast and cooperatin' with Imperial law?

 RIFF

You told us the difference, your cullawfulness. And we all chipped in for a prize for the first troll who can figure it out.

 ACTION [indicating Shrank]

Maybe grubling should get the prize.

 SHRANK

Don't grub me, Action! I got a steamy, hot-as-fresh-hoofbeastshit surprise for you: you blueblood friendelinquents don't own the streets. There's been too much raiding between you and the lowbloods. All right, Benard, get your bucketsludge outa here. [Mock Charm.] Please.

 BENARD

Let's go, Landbeasts.

[They exit.]

 SHRANK [to Wingbeasts]

If I don't put down the roughhive, I get put down -on a traffic corner. Your friends don't like traffic corners. So you grublings are gonna play spherical air projectile with me. I gotta put up with them and so do you. You're gonna make nice with them shitbloods from now on. Because otherwise I'm gonna beat the fear of Condesce into every one of ya and then cull ya. Say good-bye to the nice wrigglers, Krupke.

 KRUPKE

Good-bye, wrigglers. 

[He follows Shrank out.]

**Author's Note:**

> I'll update this as I finish new chapters, which is to say, when I feel like it.
> 
> Riff's full/real name probably has 6 letters, but he's too cool for that.


End file.
